A world that gone mad

Heartbroken, disillusioned, brutality with impunity.

A grieving nation, decades of abuse at the hands of glaring repression.

Some are wide awake and others are choosing to stay under the covers while those at the top remain silent, their own brand Miranda rights, one designed to fit their narrative.

Talking heads from the Television, fanning the flames of division and hatred, I choose not to pay attention to them, I see the images and I can draw my own conclusions, I’m disheartened.

I feel angry, everyone’s feeling it, it’s been at a boil for decades, the great society is falling apart at the seams. The honeymoon between lady liberty and I have long past ( If there ever was one, to begin with.) My hope and faith in her are no more, lost in my tears and frustration.

Love fails to reach us, hate has overtaken us, so much misunderstanding, so much distrust, total chaos, and destruction; only God was can help us now, 🙏

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Music: The refuge

Music the refuge, lost in a sea of slow piano notes, the beauty of it all, the trouble of the world around me disappears, transported to a far off world of peace and tranquility. On a boat above calming waters, with the light of the moon to guide me.
Entranced in these notes, feeling secure in the art of the distant past, self-expression through music, no words are needed, the keys speak for themselves, slowly drowning out tonight’s concerns as I close my eyes and soak it all in. Music, how I adore you..  🎵

Silent darkness

Its pitch black outside, the screaming silence of darkness, it’s surreal; dream-like, a certain eeriness that I find comforting, I could get lost in this feeling and it wasn’t for the pouring rain drenching me, I might stay here all night; learning to embrace the silent darkness that lights tend to extinguish.

Flood of healing

Memories flood back but I won’t run away from them, I’ll let them rise to the surface, I can manage the heavy rainfalls, even if it leads me to an ocean of tears. I have a boat and an oar, I can weather the storm.

It’s a distance away but I can see the shore, I can see the beam from the lighthouse guide me to land, shine the light on me, lead me to shore and to safety from this treacherous journey. If I keep moving, I know I’ll get there, even if it takes every bit of strength I have left, I’ll get there, believe that. 🚤 🌊

I guess this is growing up

I wonder about all the people I knew so long ago when I was entering my 20’s, what they are doing with their lives, the journeys they’ve taken and what road they ended up on, I wonder if they still live in the same town and are dealing with the same things or did life change trajectory at some point. I wonder if they are the same people I knew or did they inevitably change and I’m the one that stayed stagnant in these memories. I wonder if after all these years they think of me or have I been forgotten with time. Why do they take up occupancy in my mind, the past is gone, it slipped away from me, bitterness when I think about the card I was dealt, to face this alone, well I guess this is growing up. 😕

The silver lining: Gratitude

This self isolation is really difficult on everyone right now including myself, I starting to see the silver lining in these difficult times. I may be stuck home but I am spending quality time with my family and that is helping me cope because I am grateful to have two parents that will always love me and go above and beyond to support me, I love them.

I am taking this time to journal and write poetry, not for the world but for me; so I can cope and make sense of the chaos that surrounds us. Writing is my passion and my saving grace right now. And I hope to look at my writing from this time and see how I grew and became stronger as a result of these challenges.

I am very and isolated like everyone else but I have all this technology, I can call or text people, I can make video calls on zoom, I can post my thoughts and feelings and get immediate feedback. I can do live videos and my friends are so kind that it warms my heart. I love my friends online, they have no idea how they all mean to me and how much I appreciate their support.

I just wanted to add some positivity and mention that things are tough right now but there is always a silver lining, a rainbow after the storm. We will get through this, we in this together,  stay safe and take of yourselves.

 

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One night after work

I was so tall, I felt like a Giant at work, next door they were playing Dominoes, someone invited me a little get together. After work, I walked to the party with my new friends, it was close by.

We sat on the lawn and admired the grass, it was nice because I was tired from a long day’s work, my head felt heavy and eyes were beat red.

I managed to walk to the party with as much confidence as I could muster, I found myself more sociable than usual, funnier, in fact, I thought I was the life of the party.

I had so much fun, the time just flew by, come to think of it, I don’t remember a thing.

I left the party and walked back to my car, I walked through the park, I felt like a King in that park ( 😉) What a night!

 

 

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